It only lasted for a few seconds, but I did feel a little bit like an intruder when I first started listening to MixedUp by Tineka Smith and Alex Court. But then I felt welcomed to have a glimpse at their relationship and an insight into their individuality, so the unease quickly turned into gratitude. I suppose there is a degree of vulnerability you have to be willing to expose yourself to, to honestly share your experiences as an interracial couple with people you don’t know and I see courage in that.
Tineka and Alex are not only from different races but also from two different parts of the world and this adds another layer to their dynamic.
Confession!
While not meaning to take sides, I found myself rooting for Tineka as I could relate to some of her experiences and yes, I did even get mad at Alex for not being on her side in those instances I felt he should have! But then, I had to take a step back as it was not what this was about.
It was fascinating to see how both experienced the same events differently and still coming together at the end of each confession, sometimes agreeing or agreeing to disagree, letting the listener know that they are still working on some things. Understandably, Tineka’s upbringing prepared her for a world not designed for people of colour to flourish, while Alex even with an open understanding of the world he lives in, recognised his white male privileges blinded him to the many racially charged situations he witnessed Tineka facing.
Their story will be different from many interracial couples, but what they will have in common is the willingness to make room for learning about the other and themselves. Those differences will in turn prepare them for the world their children will live in, also one inevitably different from theirs and that’s ok.
Tineka and Alex, we need more stories like yours.
Thank you for sharing.
Thanking Team @midaspr for providing me with a copy of this title. You can follow Tineka and Alex at @tanika_s @courta on Twitter.